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Slow Fisting the News: Drinking Water Edition

Monday, August 4, 2014 | 0 Comment(s)

I love these news reports more than all others.  I actually light up when I see headlines such as the one that lined the top of my nbcnews.com screen today:  "Drink Up? Toledo Mayor Says Water Now Safe After Scare"

Check it out.

This news report makes my insides go "yesyesyesyesyesyesyesyesyesyes."

Why you ask?  Because this is the absolute ultimate "put your money where your mouth is" situation for a public figure.  More accurately, it is the perfect "put your mouth where your rhetoric is" situation.

"Hey mister Toledo Mayor.  How you doin? Cool cool. What's that? The water which you recently called toxic and asked just under a half-million people to avoid drinking or bathing in is now, like, totally safe.  That's cool. That's cool.  Here's the thing though Mr. Mayor.  I'm still freaked the fuck out.  You know, about the toxic, potentially poisonous, water that recently had our whole county in a clusterfuck to visit relatives.  Soooooooo, if you wouldn't mind . . . hows about stopping by the house this Wednesday and just downing a glass or two from my tap.  You know, just to be sure.  What's that? Not enough time to come to everybody's house.  Understandable, understandable.  How about we pick one lower-middle class household at random, and you can do a mini-press conference there, showing everybody how safe the water is now by chugging a liter of it on camera for all Toledoans to see! It will be a public relations coup!  Unless that is . . . you're reluctant to drink up?  You're not scared to drink the water you just declared safe right? Cause . . . that would be pretty screwed up.  A public relations nightmare."

"Looks like it's time to put your mouth where your mouth is and drink up or shut up."

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