To the woman driving the fuel efficient and super earth friendly Smart Car: 

Just because it is called a "smart" car does not make you, the owner, smart.  Case and point. I can see you cruising around, head down, texting away.  That is definitively not smart.  And not only because texting and driving is not particularly bright, but because the whole "smart car" premise revolves around not getting into a huge accident.  It's a tiny little car.  You would need one of those putty-scrappers to ply that little thing from an SUV's bumper.  The SUV might not even feel the itsy bitsy tiny little impact of your life against its chrome, and they might subsequently drag and disintegrate your smart car, and its contents, across the ensuing miles.  Think about the extra gas mileage you will save being dragged all that way.

And that's . . . . one to grow on.