Chubby Bunny of Love

Sunday, April 24, 2011 | 0 Comment(s)

Easter is a confusing holiday.  It seems all filled of mixed metaphors with its resurrection slash eggs slash renewal slash rabbits slash jellybeans.  I have to say, from a jew's perspective, this holiday just comes off . . . sloppy. 

My earliest experience with Easter, however, was very positive.  In elementary school on Easter, random lunch trays were marked with tape on the bottom. and a bunch of them said "egg" which meant that you got a plastic egg filled with jellybeans (um . . . this was in the 80s . . . so i guess it was pre-childhood obesity).  I went about my business in the lunch line.  Got my fluff samich, per usual, and hunkered down at the long white fold-down tables that you only see in school cafeterias and food kitchens.  Munching away, the announcement about the tray prizes was made and immediately 100 kids flipped their trays upside down. i can only imagine that a good amount of food took to the air, but,  being as i was about 8 years old, details like you're making a mess didn't come close to registering in my candy driven mind.

On the underside of my tray i found a piece of tape, but i did not see the word 'egg'.  I knew it wasn't "egg" because i knew what that word looked like. 3 letters long. only 2 letters involved.  These are the type of words that elementary schoolers thrive at. we are short uncomplicated word learning monsters.  And that word on my tray had 6 letters.  and it was not "eggegg" either. 

I think i brought the tray up to a teacher.  And the teachers eyes lit up.  It turned out that one tray each lunch period . . . one lucky tray . . . said basket on it.  And that lucky kid got a huge wicker basket full of marshmallow bunnies and chocolate eggs.  I remember it being a shit-ton of candy.  The school must have been glad it went to a kid as scrawny as me (80% bone).  Giving that much candy to a chubby kid would not have looked good for anyone. 

That said, one of the five jewish kids in a almost completely christian school getting the big Easter day surprise was not an irony lost on my peers.  Let's just say i was advised to put the basket in my cubby and enjoy it at home.  And, the fact that an ADHD kid (animal) like me agreed with this recommendation tells me that this probably would have been a great inroad to teaching elementary schoolers about the Holocaust.  (too far?)

In any event, later in life Easter once again became memorable as the first morning I ever woke up with mmf next to me.  While still keeping it very PG, mmf and i had an epic date which included dinner at an insanely loud restaurant (her choice), candle-pin bowling (my choice), then drinking 28oz of beer from huge Styrofoam cups while watching the end of the sox game (mutual choice), then T-ing back toward my place to go to another bar and meet my then roommate who attempted to embarrass me unsuccessfully.  and then.  after a bit of encouragement.  back to our apartment.  We remember the date, of course, because the next morning everyone in the house + sig. others went out to a big Easter brunch together.

Resurrection indeed.

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