Bullet Point Thursday!!!!

• This is how i imagine the meeting going at the advertising center of Wendy's headquarters: 

Ok everyone.  I want something fresh, hip, new.  We need a slogan that says "come to wendy's." Something that will speak to the young people.  

Executive: how about "Where's the beef?"  Exec Head: you mean our old slogan from the bygone era?
Executive: yup.  how about that again.  but you know.  again.  the old people will remember it fondly, and the majority of people will have never heard it before.  Exec Head: "BRILLIANT"


Me:  not brilliant Wendy's.  I'm not THAT old and i remember where's the beef.  What i can't for the life of me remember is why i give a flying squirrel.  Oh, that's right, it makes no sense anymore. (did it ever?).  I don't think this is going to be the moment where Wendy's surpasses McD's or even Bugger King (sic) and a purveyor of cheap questionable meat.  And they aren't in subway's league.

•  As long as i'm bagging on advertising . . . . have you seen the new Sims game?  You know, the game where you pretend to be someone else as you interact with a fake real world?  Well the new Sims asks, "Are you a cat or a dog person."  but they mean it literally.  In the new sim it looks as if you can play as an animal OR a human (and potentially a human with a animal head--i haven't entirely listened to the commercial).  But i did catch the advert beckon you to, "chase some tail."  Does that mean they've animated pets having sex?  sadly, i am pretty sure i know the answer to my own question here, but it begs the secondary question: is there any wonder that the world has so many problems when some of our best computer minds are animated animal porn instead of, well, anything but that.

Also, are they really marketing these games directly at the stereotype of lonely shut its with only their pets as company?  I mean, i have a pretty uncomfortably close relationship with my pup, and even i find no draw toward playing with animated pictures of pets being controlled by other people who may or may not want to get it on with me doggy-style.  again, literally.  

• I have grown to enjoy (GROWN to, mind you) Chelsey Handler's Chelsey Lately tv show.  I have a soft spot for ladies with sass who don't give a rat's ass.  That said, the strength/format/most guest comedians on that show are simply not funny enough to allow for a "guest host" to suffice during Chelsey's absence.  That is all i have to say on this.

• There is an old William Carlos Williams poem (one of my favorites ever) that reads: 

I have eaten
the plums
that were in
the icebox

and which
you were probably
saving
for breakfast.

Forgive me
they were delicious
so sweet
and so cold.


Here is the version i wrote and dedicated to the sneakiest sneak in the sneak-o-verse, mmf:

I have eaten
some of the candy
that you hid
in the kitchen drawer

and which
I know you hid
purposefully
under that cloth napkin.

I forgive you.
the kit-kats were delicious
and the tootsie-pop
so sweet.

 It took me 2 weeks to find that goddamn candy!