Blog-o-sphere readers.  I need your help.  I need perspective.  I need to know if I am crazy. (Wait)  Rephrase.  I need to know if my interpretation of the following events is correct or if i am being clouded by my biased-colored glasses.

I also need to preface this story by saying that i genuinely and truly love my landlords.  I have been living in an "in-law" apartment connected to my landlords' house for the past 4 years or so, and in that time I have had no major disagreements (except no dogs.  grrrrrrrr) and have been given cake, cookies, dinners, birthday presents, Hannukah beers (8.  One for each night--amazing).  They are a family of 4 (mom, dad, daughter, son) and they have really welcomed me into their lives as well as their home and I will always be incredibly thankful for everything they've done for me.  With that said . . .

The other day I was chatting with the landlords (not their kids) about the holidays coming up and, as often happens, the fact that I am Jewish came up.  As it does.  I have, in my first few years living here (solo at that time) politely declined requests to put a candle in my window (i rocked 8 candles instead, what WHAT ;)) or to put a wreath on my door.  My feeling is that this whole "Jewish thing" is not super familiar to them but they really do go out of their way to try and remember that I don't personally celebrate Christmas (i do enjoy it at my gf's parents' house though).  This is worth noting, as the mother likes to decorate their house each season (very festive), and this "holiday season" seems to be a tricky one for them, in that they are trying to consider my feelings (and the thought DOES count).  In our discussion, the mother jokingly lamented how difficult it was to find outside floor mats (yes, we have seasonal floor mats) that weren't specifically Christmas oriented.  They were so pleased to find ones they described as just saying "Joy".  How great is that!  I said, "that's great." (again, i can only get so excited about seasonal mats-christmas hannukah or otherwise).  I pictured a nice tan mat with "JOY" written in black across it.  I, was delusional.  This, is the religion neutral "joy" mat currently residing outside my front door:



So. Once again.  Is it me?  Am I crazy.  I mean, the "O" is quite clearly a Christmas tree ornament, yes?  You don't hang green balls off a menorah (you wouldn't want your chestnuts roasting on an open fire).  I've spent some time looking at this thing, and trying to wrap my head around a world in which this is the "neutral" decoration they decided upon, paying special attention to the fact that they shouldn't get anything "Christmas-y".

Now, I'm not really mad at them.  I'm not.  Especially in this case, they really did make the effort.  And I'm not the Hannukah police.  But at the same time I can't help but think two things.  Let's number them.

1.  In the end, this is my (and my gf's) front door.  I feel like we should have final say about what we have to look at every time we get home.  And personally, this particular "Joy" doesn't make me feel particularly joyful.  And I'm a joyous guy. . . .           joy.

2.  This idea that that mat (say it 5x fast) is religiously neutral (unless i, in fact, am the crazy one here) is the type of negligence about this season that really gets to me.  This idea that Jews are "complainers" or "over-sensitive" for not wanting these symbols to represent them or in their homes.  No, your wreath is not "kinda non-denominational cause it's natural."  No, it is not "just a decorative mat" that I'm making a big fuss about.  I bet you if i put dreidel (which my spell-check believes in misspelled btw) mats in front of a whole bunch of houses, I wouldn't get a lot of "oh it's just a fun game with candy" reactions.  There is a tremendous double standard in the amount that minorities are expected "just deal" with the larger majorities gross oversight of their reality.  And when they don't want to "just deal," they are the problem.  And perhaps it's because I'm a social psychologist, but what this makes me think about most powerfully is that if I feel this way as a Jew (a relatively high status minority), I can only imagine how difficult it is for other minorities.  I mean, for racial minorities, every day is Jewish Christmas.  Something to think about.

Tomorrow is the first night of Hannukah.  If you celebrate it, I hope yours is filled with joy.