This is going to be a multi-parter folks.  I'm telling you straight up front.  Don't act all surprised when the "to be continued. . . " gets thrown up there.  Ok. Disclaimer done.

I spend a lot of  time at the UMass pool.  And, conveniently, there is an old locker room attached to the pool.  I should add that the new gym complex just openned, but doesn't have a pool.  What this says to me is that an old gym locker room from the 80's which is already filthy gross is now going to get forgotten about (due to only being used by swimmers) and get super dirty filthy gross.  Anyways.  This is all the setup for what I am calling "The 5 People You Meet if you Spent Time in the Men's Pool Locker Room."

Number 1:  Ol' Man Whistler

Ol' Man Whistler (OMW) is almost always around . . . somewhere.  He's a lifer in these parts and the locker room is more like his home bathroom than a public area.  But, OMW's most prominent feature is his ability to constantly whistle the first 3/4th of a line of a song, that you are just about to recognize, when he switches to the first 3/4ths of the next song.  It's vocal ADD really.  But when you echo your song fragments across a gym locker room, it is the mouth music equivalent of chinese water torture.  I have actually run into someone that I met at the pool, and the first thing he talked about was OMW.  And while i find his "tune" incredibly obnoxious, this guy was talking violence.  OMW better watch his back.


Next time on TBRARUMUD . . . #2: Chief Stands on Bench      and      #3:  Mr. Confidence